Second Chance at Love - 8
 

Sonny stared into her face for a few moments, just taking in her words.
"Pregnant?" He whispered.

Brenda bit her lip, nodding. "It's yours, I just couldn't keep that from
you like I did before...I already hate myself enough for lying to you."
She turned to look into his face. "My life has been such a mess, Sonny,
these last ten years or so, but the best times of my life have been
these last few years...being a mother. Now I can give my children the
life and love I never got from parents. And I-" She bit her lip to stop
the quivering.  She knew she was about to burst into tears "-and I know
how you felt about your baby with Lily, you couldn't leave your child
like Mike had left you and I'm so sorry, so sorry for doing that to you
Sonny. It was for merely selfish reasons and I'm-" She shook her head as
the tears rolled down her face. "Can you ever, ever forgive me for
betraying you?"

Sonny smiled. "The old Sonny would have said no. But I hurt you too,
Brenda, more than you could ever hurt me. Don't cry, sweetheart, it's
alright. Don't cry." He brushed the tears from her face.  "You know I'll
be there for you every step of the way, don't you, baby?" He traced his
finger across her cheek.

Brenda nodded. For some reason, she began to cry harder. "Sonny..." She
whispered it softly, gravely, and he tilted her chin up.

"Close your eyes, baby," Sonny told her softly into her ear. She
complied, and parted her lips softly. He kissed her, slowly,
passionately, and then pulled back, leaving her dizzy with emotion.  He
nuzzled her neck, and kissed her throat. "I've got to go," He whispered.

Brenda nodded, even though she silently begged him to stay. She wipped
away her tears. "Thank you for coming."

"Thank you for telling me." Sonny kissed her hand. "Mind if I come back
tomorrow to formally meet my children?"

Brenda laughed and stood up. "I'd love it if you came back. I'll buy
some food, and you can cook for us."

Sonny giggled. "Why thank you for that lovely invitation."

Brenda shrugged, "No problem. I've got more where that came from."

"Tomorrow, 7ish?" Brenda nodded, and tucked her cascading hair behind
her ear. Sonny sighed. "God, you're still beautiful after all these
years. More beautiful than I've ever seen you."

Brenda blushed slightly. "Must be the motherhood. I love it. I'd have a
thousand children-"

"And you'd still be the most beautiful creature in the world to me. I
mean it." He gave her one of his intense stares before turning and
walking down the pathway, got into his car and drove away.

Brenda stared after him without even realizing what she was doing. She
didn't even hear Lois' car pull up, Brooke Lynn's screeches as she
joined her god-brother and sister in the yard, or Lois' thick Brooklyn
accented voice call, "Hey, Bren!"

It was only after Lois swatted her in the head with her long nails did
Brenda stir. "Oww!" Brenda gasped, and smiled when she saw her friend,
"Lo! What was that for?"

"Just wanted to see if you were alive, is all." She sat next to her best
friend and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "So, I drive up, you
have this look upon your face...the same look you used to have when you
were with Sonny."

Brenda cleared her throat, nodding. "Sonny and I are gonna have a baby,
Lo."

Lois smiled and playfully bumped her shoulder against Brenda's. "So, you
told him the truth." It wasn't a question.

"Yup. He didn't...he's not mad. He was...Lois, I think that I'm falling
again." Brenda looked over into her friend's face. "And this time, it's
not, it's not the way it was before. He's so much different now. He
tells me things without hesitating, he doesn't get mad at the stupidest
things, and when he tells me he loves me, I...I dunno, it does something
to me that it didn't do before."

"What?"

"It made me hopeful," Brenda sighed. "Being in love with Sonny was the
most wonderful, but frightful thing I had ever felt. Now, it doesn't
feel that way. It feels good. God, it feels incredible."

"So, what you're saying is you're in love with Sonny?"

Brenda pulled her hair back and upinto a sloppy bun. She tucked the
tendrils of her hair behind her ear and shrugged. "I'm falling, Lois.
The thing is...I don't think I want to stop."
 

"They're coming out great Carly.  At least I think they are."  Brenda
said into the phone the next afternoon sitting on the entry floor of her
house.  The kids watched a video a few yards away.  "I think Lucy'll
love them."

"When are we supposed to show them to her again?"

"Ummm.... Hold on."  Brenda shuffled through some papers and found her
date book.  She flipped through it.  "Next Tuesday at nine."

"Where?"

"The Lighthouse."

"I am so happy for her and Kevin."

"I know.  When she told me that they were finally getting married I told
her it was about time."

"I can't believe she asked us to design her wedding gown."

"Well she liked the dress we did for the Nurses Ball.  I think as long
as it's not red she'll love it."

"'Scuse me?"

"Long story."

"Abridged version."

"When she married Alan there was a mix-up at the dress shop and she got
this garish, jungle red monstronsity."

"You're kidding."

"No and it came with this big brimmed red hat.  I've seen pictures."

"Poor Lucy."

"Anyway for this walk down the aisle she wants a cream-colored dress,
about down to the knees, off the shoulder and no bows."

"You can handle it."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence."

"Does she want gloves?"

"Oh you know what, I didn't ask."

"Call and ask right now or else you'll forget."

"Thanks Carly."

"No problem.  Okay so I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yep.  Twelve at the newly renovated Outback."

"Bye and don't forget to-"

"Call Lucy.  Bye Carly."

"Bye Bren."  Brenda pressed flash and then dialed the Lighthouse.

"Hello?"

"Lucy, it's Brenda."

"Brenda, oh I'm so glad you called.  Listen did I give you the
specifications for the wedding dress?"

"Yes you did and that's part of the reason I'm calling.  Carly and I
were wondering, do you want gloves with your dress?"

"Oh no.  I had gloves the last time and we all know how that turned
out."

"Right.  Okay Lucy no gloves.  Got it."

"So how are the drawings coming?"

"Wonderfully."

"Oooooh  I can't wait."

The doorbell rang just then.  "Well you're gonna have to because I have
to go.  I'll see ya on Tuesday."

"Okay.  Ta!"

"Ta!"  Brenda hung up the phone and hopped up to answer the door.  She
swung it open and was faced with grocery bags.  She giggled.  "Hello
back there?"

"Very funny.  Can you direct me to the kitchen?"

"Yeah.  Here give me one of the bags."

"No way.  No lifting."

"Sonny grocery bags are not going to send me into premature labor. Now
give."  She said snatching a bag from him, turning around, and marching
into the kitchen.  Sonny laughed and followed her after closing the door
behind him.  "So what are you making?"

"Veal parm."

"That's Morgan's all-time favorite."

"For real?"

"Yeah."

"Well for desert I brought a chocolate mousse cake from The Outback."

"That's Scorpio's."

"Really?  You're not just trying to make me feel better?"

"Would I do that?  Seriously though I'm pretty damn sure they're going
to love you."

"What about their mother?" he asked softly.

"She's working on it.  That's all she can give right now."

"It's enough.  For now."

"C'mon let's get cooking.  Oh but first I've gotta clean up my drawings
in the living room.  Be right back."  Brenda left the kitchen and Sonny
started taking things out of the bags.  Brenda came back in a few
minutes later.

"What are the kids doing?"

"Watching tapes of that old show Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

"You're kidding."

"Nope.   They both love it.  Lois got them the entire tape set for
Chirstmas.  They watch one a week at least."

"Remind me to thank her."

"Tell me about it." She grinned.  "Do you want something to drink?"

"What do you have?"

"Well I don't have a lot of alcohol.  I usually make Jason or Ned bring
their own if they come for dinner but I do have a bottle of wine Alexis
gave me about a year ago."

"What kind?"

"I'm not sure.  Gimme a minute."  She turned and started looking through
the shelves of her kitchen.

Sonny watched her and thought silently, I'll give you all the time in
the world baby.  All the time in the world.

"Bren?"

"Yeah?"

"I was thinking."

"Always dangerous."

"Ha-ha.  I'm so amused.  Anyway you only have three bedrooms right?"

"Yeah.  I guess I should start looking into real estate, huh?"

"What do you think about us moving into together?"
 

Brenda dropped the bottle of wine, and cursed as it hit the floor. She
fell to her knees to pick it up, thanking God it didn't break and
shatter into a million pieces.

"M-m-moving in together?" Brenda stuttered.

Sonny bit his lip to come from laughing at her display. "Yeah. I mean,
the penthouse isn't really mine anymore, it's Jason and his family's...I
want to be with my family. And since you're pregnant, you know that I
want to monitor you 24/7, I can't let you out of my sight."

Brenda smiled as she started to uncork the wine. She struggled with the
screw, tucked her hair behind her ear, and sat back on her heels. "Yeah,
but, Sonny, then people will start to get the idea that we
are...well...you know..."

"No, I don't."

Brenda sighed and rolled her eyes. "INVOLVED. And we're not. We're just
two really good friends who happened to sleep together one night-"

Sonny laughed. "We may be friends now, baby, but we weren't always."

Brenda smiled at the memories. "We were something, weren't we?"

"So, is that a yes?"

Brenda sighed. "Alright, fine, you can move in. But you sleep in the
extra bedroom, not mine, understand?"

Sonny shrugged. "I'll wear you down eventually, baby. You know that you
can't resist me for long."

"No, I don't know that." Brenda snapped playfully.

Sonny smiled and peeked back into the grocery bag. "Alright." He said.
"Let's get cracking."

****

Half hour later and they were still cooking. Well, Sonny was, Brenda was
sitting at the small kitchen table doodling on a pad.

"Sonny, that smells delicious," Brenda moaned.

Sonny smiled and  sat down across from her. "It tastes better than it
looks."

"You certaintly are full of yourself, aren't you?" She was grinning
though.

Sonny shrugged, "Ahh, not really. I just never really got the chance to
cook where I was before and now that I'm back home, it's like I...I
can't stop!!!"

Brenda beamed. "Well, I'm glad that I'll be able to sample more of your
food in the future."

Sonny squeezed her knee. "You and that baby of ours'll be fed like
you've never been fed before. I promise."

Brenda looked down at her hands. "Yeah, well, we all know how well your
promises worked out before, now don't we."

Sonny raised his eyebrows. "Well, I guess I deserve that."

"Good, because you do." She stood up. "What do you say we do this? What
do you say-"

"Brenda."

"What?" She turned to look at him, her long hair slamming into her face.

Sonny sighed. "I'm trying to make up for that here. Can't you see that?
I'm trying to forget it. I thought that you could-"

"You thought that I could forget something like that?" Brenda placed a
hand on her hip. "I haven't even BEGUN to *forgive* you yet, Sonny! I'm
just begining to know what it feels like to trust you, Sonny, and you
want me to FORGET!"

"NO!" Sonny urged. "I was going to say that I thought you could at least
stop rubbing it in my face. I'm not proud of what I've done to you,
sweetheart. I'm not proud of the fact that I broke your heart, that I
broke *you*, you think I wanted to do that?" When she didn't answer, he
said, "Answer me!"

Brenda looked up and shook her head. "I don't know what to think. I
never do." Her eyes glistened with tears.

"Well, I didn't. I like to think that I'm better than that, now, even
though I wasn't always. And I like to think that you think better of me
now. But you wanna talk about faults? What about keeping my children
from me all of these years?"

"I thought you said you forgave me for that!" Brenda cried.

Sonny looked down at his feet. "Yeah, well, I'm trying, sweetheart. You
know what?"

"What?" Brenda searched his face, the tears beginning to slid down her
cheeks.

"I'm not as stupid as you thought I was. I knew Morgan and Scorpio were
my children, long before you told me."

Brenda's heart sank. The tears slid slowly, one by one down her cheeks,
but she didn't weep or sob. "Jason told you."

"Before he did, and don't get mad at him. I forced it out of him. I know
why you didn't tell me, baby, I can even respect that. But forgive it?
That has to take time. A lot of time."

Brenda nodded her head. "I want you to know something, Sonny."

"What?" He whispered, almost coldly.

"The second I knew I had life in my body, life beyond my own, life that
we had created together...I felt healed. You did that for me, Sonny. And
I'm so grateful for it." She bit her lip and swipped at her tears.
"More grateful than you could possibly understand."

"I love you, Brenda." Sonny told her again. He was going to tell her
over and over, until she'd never doubt it again.

"I know you do." Brenda whispered, cupping her hands against her nose.
She pushed them outward, and cleaned her face of tears, only for them to
be replaced again. "I do. I won't doubt it ever again, Sonny."

He walked over to her slowly. Taking her face in his hands, he
whispered, "I love you so much." He took her hand and placed it over his
heart. "I love you." Brenda watched as he lifted her hand and kissed it.

Brenda smiled through her tears. "I feel your heart beat," she
whispered.

"It beats for you."

Brenda felt the torrent coming and she pulled back, brushing her hair
from her eyes. "Wow. Uh...hey, whaddya say we sit down and get this over
with? Yeah, I'd say it's about time."


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