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Bobbie slowly pushed open the door
to the ICU room allowing a small
stream of light to pour into the
dim room. She slipped inside, drinking
in the sight of her nephew. His
head was covered in a thick layer of
sterile white bandages. IV tubes
impaled his arms. Wires ran down his
pillow from behind his head, joining
more wires that emerged from the
top of his paper hospital gown.
Her eyes traced them to the large
ominous machines next to him. The
small electronic screens jumped with
the movement of his brain waves.
Bobbie's eyes filled with tears......
those lines were the most reassuring
thing she could see right now.
This whole situation was bringing
up painful memories for her......
memories of BJ's death. Her little
girl had been like this, lying
broken in a hospital bed, hooked
to all these machines, because of a
horrible tragedy....... an accident.........
the one difference was
Lucky had a chance..... something
BJ lost the minute that bus crashed.
A small moan rose from the bed and Bobbie jumped forward.
"Lucky?!"
She looked back at the monitor and
smiled tearfully when she saw the
change in movement of the waves.
"Lucky, it's Bobbie........ you're going to be fine.........."
Bobbie faded off as she remembered
the circumstances of the situation.
Those were probably not the words
he wanted to hear right now.
"Oh Lucky...... Lucky you have to
hear me okay? This is important....
You have to hear this...... Lucky,
Luke IS your father. Not Stefan. Tony
ran blood tests and everything......
We broke just about every ethical
guideline in the book but........
Lucky, your blood type couldn't even
be derived from Stefan's."
Bobbie drew a deep breath to steady herself.
"Lucky, I need you to wake up and
understand. I need to know.... I need
you to tell me that you understand....
that you believe me. You know you
can believe me right? I've never
lied to you Lucky, and I promise you
I never will..... You can trust
me Lucky..... always...... Whenever you
need me I promise I'll help......
I just wish you had realized that
before you went and did this........"
Bobbie looked up and a soft smile
spread across her lips. Pushing her
chair away from the bed, she stood
and leaned over, placing a light kiss
on Lucky's bandaged head. She quietly
exited the room and comfortingly
hugged the welcomed visitor.
"Emily."
Emily pulled back from the embrace to wipe at her tear-filled eyes.
"Oh Bobbie, I just found out. I
would have been here sooner but the
Quartermaines thought they protecting
me by not telling me! He could
have died and I would've never
known!"
Her thoughts drifted back to memories of Matt.
"Guess it wouldn't have been the first time that's happened."
Bobbie put her hand gently on Emily's arm.
"Emily....."
The tears that were pooling in Emily's
eyes spilled out on to her
cheeks.
"I just couldn't believe it......
I didn't want to..... please tell
me it's not true... he didn't......."
Bobbie looked away.
"Yeah, Emily.... he wanted to kill himself."
She bit back a sob as Bobbie continued quickly.
"But you have to understand, they
were extreme circumstances and Lucky
was given some false information....."
"What kind of information?"
"He overheard Luke telling Laura
he thought Lucky wasn't his,
but....... Stefan's......"
"Oh my god! Lucky must've been...... oh god....."
"Only it's not true, and Lucky and Luke didn't know."
Emily wiped the tears from her eyes.
"Does he know? The truth I mean......"
Bobbie shook her ruefully.
"No...... neither of them know.....
I can't find Luke, and Lucky is
still unconscious."
The tears began re-pooling in Emily's eyes.
"Is he gonna......."
Bobbie smiled tearfully.
"He's gonna be fine...... it's a miracle."
Emily expelled a breath she had been unconsciously holding.
"Thank god........where's Mrs. Spencer?"
Bobbie's smile faded
"She was having trouble dealing
with all of this...... she needed some
help......"
Emily caught on and nodded to indicate
it. She turned back toward the
observation window.
"C....can I go see him?"
Bobbie's smile returned again.
"Of course Emily...... I think it'd
be good for him to know you're
here and care."
"I do care Bobbie...... so much......"
************************************************************************
He could feel the icy cold fingers
of death wrap around him, sending a
chill throughout his body so cold.......
coldness....... that's all he
could feel, that and a feeling
of suspension. He felt suspended in time
and place, suspended between consciousness
and slumber, suspended in the
gray area between light and dark.
In this place he could hear the echo
of voices calling him from outside.......
<< "Lucky? Lucky, it's Bobbie........." >>
His mind told him to be happy however
his muscles wouldn't let him
express it. It took him long enough
to remember what had happened and by
the looks of it reaction would
take even longer. He felt Bobbie release
his hand and a slight pain in his
head....... She must have touched his
head..... the drugs were wearing
off. Now if he could only clear the
blurryness out of his head......
There was too much he needed to be
thinking about..... a fight......
he could remember the fight.......
there was blood..... no .......there
wasn't blood...... Bobbie said
Stefan wasn't his dad...... what
the hell does that mean.....
bloodtypes....... It was a fight
about blood types. And then he
.......dear god, what did he do?
A nauseated feeling rose in the pit of
his stomach. He was in the hospital.......
why....... why?..... Any way
he got here couldn't have been
an accident. A chill ran through his
body. He felt himself falling,
with each sinking depth. He felt his
emotions culminating.... fear,
anger, happiness, and despair his
guttural instinct was telling him
to grab something to stop
falling...... to hold but the panic
and thick fog clouded his mind and
now the mechanical beeps of the
monitors filled his head in a sonorous
tone accompanied only e the ringing
his ears were now producing.
"I'm dying for a lie....... why.......
why..... no, no.....god I have
to stop falling....... please......."
And as quickly as he had fallen
through that hole in his consciousness
he stopped. A hand was pulling
him out. He could feel the warmth spread
down his arm into his body soothing
the exposed emotional nerves. The
ringing stopped and the beeping
slowed. A gentle yet anxious voice cut
through the fog.
"Lucky? God should I get a doctor? Lucky?! Are you alright?"
At that she broke down into sobs.
Emily....... Lucky felt a dull ache in
his chest........ a pain he knew
all too well...... the same feeling he
got every time he heard Emily cry.
His heart ached, and he wanted so
desperately to comfort her........
here she was for him, at his
bedside...... but where had he
been when she needed him? He was off
playing the war game that so much
of his life had come to revolve
around. He'd abandoned her when
she needed him most.... and while
he'd chastised himself, muchless
expect Emily to........ But here she
was crying for him, terrified.......
He never wanted her to feel like
that ......... much less over him.
He had to wake up and reassure
her....... and apologize.........
************************************************************************
Emily stood frozen to the floor,
torn between running to get a doctor
and staying by Lucky's side. Not
having the will to leave him. She ran
to his side and tightly squeezed
his hand.
"Lucky? Lucky! God, should I get a doctor? Are you alright?"
The tears quickly escaped her eyes.
"Lucky please wake up....... you're scaring me!"
Slowly the monitors returned to
their previous patterns. The rise and
fall of his chest slowed, and Emily
found herself mirroring the
movement. She slumped down in the
chair next to her still tightly
clutching his hand. Her other hand
moved tenderly to brush at his
cheeks, now covered in beads of
sweat. A lump rose in her throat as she
took in his appearance. He was
sweating profusely despite his extreme
pallor. The top of his head was
covered in a thick layer of bandages,
leaving only a few strands of dampened
hair cling to his forehead. Her
fingers found their was to these
strands, brushing them away from his
eyes, and then sliding back down
to his cheek.
"Lucky........ Oh Lucky every time
I try to be mad at you........ I was
mad you know...... mad that you
never seemed to be around
anymore........ mad that I missed
you so much. I would have helped you,
you know. We used to have something
between us Lucky, that was so
special..... you're the only guy
I've ever run away with.
She smiled wistfully, remembering
the treasured memories of their
escapade through the desert.
"We trusted each other so much back
then....... told each other
everything. We literally went to
the ends of the earth to help one
another.
He smile faded.
"I don't know when we decided we
could stop doing that......... I
don't think we stopped helping
each other, I think we stopped
confiding in one another........
We got afraid to dump our problems on
each other........ I don't know........
I suppose that's what people
who love each other do so they
don't hurt one another.
Emily stopped.
Boy, when you're talking straight
from the heart, sometimes the one
you're talking to isn't the only
one being newly informed of your
feelings.......... love each other?
Those words had slipped so easily
out of her mouth she hadn't noticed
them. She shook her head. Of
course she loved him...... he was
her best friend........ she'd always
love him, just like she'd always
love Alan and Monica, Jason and AJ,
Ned and ..........
She tightly squeezed her eyes shut.
Why did it all sound so shallow
right now? She looked down at his
still form, the conflicting emotions
raging inside her. He's your best
friend......... you know you love
him, that shouldn't be a surprise.
You didn't feel this was when
Jason was shot......... why? You
don't love one better than the
other.....maybe you just love them
differently....... how many ways can
you love a person? No...... no
she shook her head resolutely..... you
love him for the friend he is.
Different circumstances, different
emotion.
"Lucky, I do love you, you know."
Shallow.
"You're the best friend I've ever
had....... I'll always love you
for that........"
Stop lying.... there's more you know it.
Emily pushed the voices out of her head.
"You know why you're my best friend?
Because you gave me what I needed
so much...... honesty. You were
always straight with me Lucky....... And
I don't thank you enough for that.
You were exactly what I needed.....
I don't know what you were getting
from your end of the deal.......
Nothing that could ever make up
for your friendship...... And I know you
feel bad abut lying to me about
your mom's death....... I know you
do..... and I won't deny that it
didn't hurt..... but Lucky, I
understand...... I understand why
you had to do it.
Emily looked down at her hands, now intertwined in her lap.
"I guess....... I guess I just needed
to tell you that. The whole way
here I kept making this mental
list of things I wanted to tell you.....
I was so scared I wouldn't be able
to....... When my m...mom passed
away...... there was this......
peace...... we had all this time to
prepare and say our good-byes,
that when she left, it seemed...... I
don't know.... well, almost natural.
Lucky...... the thought of you
leaving and... me never getting
to say goodbye...... you can't do that
to me......... EVER."
She could feel her throat constricting as she spoke.
"There's so many things left for
me to tell you....... things that
haven't even happened yet........
time that hasn't even passed yet
for us to reflect on. I remember
you told me once that life is too short
to reflect on the past........"
Emily gritted her teeth against
the pain and rage bubbling up insider
her.
"But life isn't this short Lucky.......
life isn't so short you
don't have anything to reflect
on..... we don't you know........ we
think we have so much in our pasts........
that we've already
experienced so much........ but
we haven't....... this is just the
beginning Lucky....... it's just
the beginning.
Luke tentatively stepped back from
the fire, searching for the best
place to enter.
"Hell, they're all out doors......"
He lifted his arm using it to shelter
his eyes from the intense light
and heat.
"NIKOLAS! Hey Nikky, your loving
uncle Crabapple isn't here to save
you, you're gonna haffta settle
for me!"
With a final deep breath Luke charged into the fiery building.
************************************************************************
Nikolas leaned against the wall,
his insides twisting and suffocating
under the thick smoke that rolled
into his lungs. His coughs came in
quick wheezes, his eyes red and
glazed over from the burning sensation.
"HELP......... HELP ME!!!"
He continued to stumble down the
hallway, now illuminated by the flames
that danced around him. His breath
was shallow now, and he could feel
the heavy haze invading his body,
weighing him down, and dragging him to
his knees. The walls spun around
him, and the floor dipped to meet his
unsteady gaze.
"Oh god........ HELP!"
His voice was raspy, and the lack
of air put behind it made the words
shallow and barely audible. The
coughs came, wracking his body, sending
him hunched over. Each sending
a reverberating pain throughout him.
He could feel the cool wooden floorboards
under his cheek now. His mind
was slowing, unfocusing.......
"No....... you've........ got to
stay..... awake Nikolas......."
His eyelids were heavy, and his eyes
burned...... he was losing the
battle to keep them open. He could hear
someone yelling........ Luke?.........
No....... my ears must be being
affected too........ crabapple?..........
no, that was definitely Luke.
************************************************************************
"NIKOLAS!!!"
Luke dashed through the hallway
dodging the debris and patches of fire
now scattered on the floor.
"Where are you kid?!"
Luke paused as he heard a small
groan rise from below the thick gray
smoke. Squatting down he breathed
a sigh of relief only to have it cut
short bye a series of dry coughs.
"Okay, uppsie-daisy Nikky....... we gotta get outta here and fast."
Luke grabbed his arms and hoisted
him up. Nikolas swayed on his feet and
his head rolled atop his shoulders
like a limp doll. Luke reached over
and lightly slapped his cheek.
"Come on......."
Luke grabbed his chin forcing him to look him directly in the eyes.
"HEY! Listen up! I didn't come in
here to die! I want to go out in a
blaze of glory, but this is not
the blaze I had in mind.......... I'm
not gonna die here, Lucky needs
me........ he might need you too
someday........ that's why I'm
not leavin' here without you! Now
look..... you've got to work with
me here........ WAKE UP DAMMIT!!!
Nikolas' head snapped up. His voice
was dry and gravely among the many
wheezing coughs exuding from his
throat.
"Okay........."
Luke grabbed his arm, slinging it
onto his shoulders and shifted to
support Nikolas' weight.
"Uh.... god kid....... this really
is the last time I'm doing this for
you."
He could see the doorway ahead of
them, increasing in size as they
approached. The door wasn't growing
nearly fast enough...... It felt
as though they were moving through
water, each step, requiring more and
more effort as the thick gray poison
invaded their lungs. Nikolas
blinked his eyes several times,
focusing on the small black rectangle as
it grew and small bright stars
became evident. He could feel the air
grow colder, and more pure. A tidal
wave of crisp clean air hit him as
he passed through the door, and
he found himself falling to the ground.
Luke dropped down next to him,
and lay exhausted and desperate for a
breath of air in between his coughs.
Nikolas turned his head and watched
him a moment, his own wheezing
subsiding.
"Thanks."
Luke turned and looked at him incredulously.
"Thanks? I save your life yet again
and you say Thanks?!
Thanks is what you say when you
get a casserole from a neighbor,
not when someone pulls you from
burning wreckage......... you know next
time I decide to risk my life to
save you...... institutionalize me."
Nikolas ignored Luke's acrimonious
words, and instead turned his
attention to the fire. The flames
had engulfed nearly the entire house
now. Every antique, every family
heirloom, every piece of gothic
furniture now lit up the sky for
what seemed like miles. A smile spread
across Nikolas' face........."It's
the brightest Wyndemere's ever
been." He felt the rumbling low
in his throat, and rising up until it
erupted from his mouth in a burst
of uncontrollable laughter. Luke
turned to him once again nonplussed
by this unexpected reaction.
"Maybe you're the one that needs to be institutionalized?"
He watched in utter disbelief as
tears of laughter sprang to Nikolas'
eyes.
"You really have lost your marbles............
what the hell is the
matter with you?!!"
Nikolas turned back to Luke seemingly surprised by his own emotion.
"I guess....... I guess I'm just happy to be alive."
Luke furrowed his brow, staring
intently at him. His eyes roamed his
face, studying his features. This
kid was genuinely happy..... an
emotion Luke himself hadn't been
too familiar with for a while. But
there it was staring back at him......
honest to god, true happiness, so
pure, so void of any underlying
emotion....... just what was on the
surface. Luke searched again looking
for the trick card...... a
suspicious sparkle in the eyes,
a mischievous curve of the mouth, a pair
of trembling hands.......... nothing.
Nikolas was showing his raw and
true emotion. This boy loved life........
he loved being alive. He had a
thirst for it........ a wild rush
from living. Luke smiled shakily and
fought the tears behind his eyes.
Lucky....... there was a time Lucky
was that way........ so happy,
so alive...... a testament of the love
him and Laura shared, the amazing
life they created...... or he had
thought they created..... Lucky
was always so adapting because of his
thirst for life.... he would go
anywhere and do anything to live it. He
was so full of life he lived everyday
to experience it....... Lucky was
the opposite of what Luke had been
during his childhood and Luke had
taken pride in that......... he
drew strength from it......... Lucky was
alive and happy. And that's all
that ever mattered.
Luke couldn't pinpoint the exact
time when it changed. When his pure
and ingenuous happiness became
soiled with the emotions one tends to
lock away. Sure he was still happy,
but under the surface he hid the
feelings of anger, sorrow, disappointment,
and fear. Maybe it was when
Nikolas had shown up that all these
feelings seemed to buoy to the
surface........
Luke closed his eyes against the
memory. His son had been in so much
pain..... he tried to help him........
he did. But every time he looked
into his once bright and shining
eyes, he saw the lost faith and pain
dulling the crystal blue pools.
That was when he could see the happiness
dying....... That was when his
son started dying........ and he
didn't stop it.
"Luke?"
The voice shook him out of his reverie,
reminding him he wasn't alone.
He turned back to Nikolas, unaware
of the hot tears trailing down his
soot-streaked cheeks. Any remnant
of Nikolas' smile immediately
vanished as his countenance took
on a concerned expression.
"Luke?"
"My son is dead........... I killed
him.............."