|
|
"Hey. Where were you?"
"Picking your anniversary present up."
"You didn't have to do that."
"Yes I did. Actually I was
gonna save it for Christmas but I got a
little excited about it and decided
that you should have it before."
"What is it?"
"Open it and find out." She handed him a box.
"Okay." Sonny opened the box
top and took out a Christmas ornament. It
was a blue glass ball with Sonny
written on it in silver block letters.
"Do you like it?"
"I love it. I just don't understand."
"It's kind of a tradition.
All of our family and close friends have
Christmas ornaments with their
names on them and every year they come
over and hang them. Robin
used to hang Stone's and last year Scorpio
hung Mike's. I remember the
first time I hung Alex's. Julia had it
made when she was born and sent
it to me. I hang Alex's and Ned for
some bizarre reason always wants
to hang Julia's. Maybe it's residual
feelings or something."
"Holding on to someone he'll always feel something for?"
"Yeah. But they didn't exactly part on the best of terms."
"Oh yeah? What happened?"
"He caught her with AJ."
"You're kidding?"
"Nope."
"No accounting for taste."
"AJ's not all bad. Actually he's a pretty good kisser."
"What? When did you kiss AJ?"
"When we were teenagers."
"Oh." He smiled sheepishly.
"You were jealous." She teased.
"Was not." He mumbled as he studied the ornament he held.
"Aww honey. If it makes you
feel any better I slapped AJ after he
kissed me."
"A little." He admitted.
"C'mere." She put his arms around
him. "I never want to kiss anyone but
you for the rest of my life."
"Good because I don't plan on letting
you kiss anyone else for the rest
of your life." He said as he kissed
her. Things were getting intense
when the phone rang.
"I hate phones." Brenda whined.
"Me too." Sonny said as he picked it up and hit talk. "Corinthos."
"Sonny? It's Jason."
"Hey man what's up?"
"I've got some good news."
"Oh yeah? What?"
"I think we found Alex."
Brenda watched Sonny's blank expression
as he talked on the phone. "Uh
huh. . .alright. . . Great, thanks,
man. . . Yeah, I'll tell her. .
.Alright. . .Yeah, bye."
Brenda watched Sonny with curiosity.
He threw the phone down onto the
couch and turned to her. "Who was
that?"
"Jason."
"Oh My God, does he know something?"
Sonny nodded and walked over to her. "Sit down."
"Oh my God. . ." Brenda's eyes filled
with tears. "Sonny, why am I
feeling like what you're about
to tell me. . .is something that I don't
want to hear?"
He sat her down and then sat next to her. "Sweetheart?"
"Yes."
"Jason thinks that he's found Alex."
Brenda gasped. "What!? Oh my God, is she okay? Is she- Oh, no, Sonny-"
"No, no, no, wait, sweetheart. See,
this is why I didn't want to tell
you, you're getting to worked up.
Calm down." He took her face in his
hands and placed his forehead against
hers. "He's going to go and
follow up on the lead and let us
know-"
"I want to be with him-" She rushed to her feet just as Sonny said,
"No!"
Brenda turned to him, her long hair
flying into her tear-stained face.
"What?"
"Baby, you're going to sit here
in this house with me, let me cook you
some dinner, you're going to relax.
You're four months pregnant, this is
no time to be getting all excited."
"But, Sonny, that's my baby out
there!" She pointed out the window in
panic. "She needs me. . ."
Her face crumpled and her hands flew into
her face as she broke down into
tears. Sonny sighed and enveloped her
into his arms and squeezed her
tightly as she wept into his arms. After
a few minutes, Brenda sighed and
wrenched herself away from her husband.
She brushed her tears away and
shook her head. "Hmm. No crying," She
sighed and looked into Sonny's
concerned brown eyes. "It's hard to be
brave when you're staring right
through me."
Sonny smiled and put her hand against
his cheek. "You said that to me
before, remember?"
Brenda nodded. "Yeah, I do." She
looked around impatiently. "How long
will it take Jason to check things
out?"
Sonny shrugged. "A few hours. Don't
worry baby, he promises me that
he'll call as soon as he finds
something out. You know that this is
best, for the baby. And for
you." Brenda nodded again, but said
nothing. They were silent for a
few moments, before Sonny took both of
her hands in his and gazed at them,
at her long, beautiful fingers and
neatly manicured fingers. He twirled
her diamond around her finger, and
then raised them to his mouth to
kiss them. "Come on, sweetheart, let me
go fix you some food, okay?"
* * * * * * * * *
Three hours later, they were sitting
on the floor in the living room,
leaning against the couch, Brenda's
arms crossed over Sonny's. She held
a plate of cheesecake in her hand
and quickly scooped up a little bit
onto her fork. "Eat!" She
ordered Sonny, and led the fork into his
mouth. They laughed together as
he hungrily devoured the chunk and then
got Brenda her own piece.
They continued to feed each other for a
little bit, and sat in front of
the small fire that they had burned.
Brenda rested her head on Sonny's
shoulder, mumbling, "Sonny. . .I'm
going insane waiting here. I feel
like I'm being a bad mother! I should
be out there. . .looking for my
daughter, instead of having Jason do it!
Why am I in here like a helpless
little puppy?"
"Baby, we talked about this, you know that it's best!"
"But I hate feeling this way! You
know how much I hate this feeling!"
She turned to look at him. "I hate
it so much that I could. . .ARGH! I
could scream!"
"Go ahead!" Sonny offered.
Brenda looked at him as if he had just told her hair was blue. "Huh?"
"Go ahead and scream. Let it out. It's for the best, anyways."
Brenda rolled her eyes at him, but
smiled. Her smile faded when the
telephone rang. It sounded shrill
and fierce, loud, urgent. Brenda
shrieked and rushed to her feet,
slamming down hard on Sonny's leg in
the process. "Ow! Oooh, shit, dammit,
baby, that hurt!"
"Oh! Oh! Oh! I'm sorry!" Brenda
went to put an apologetic hand on his
leg, but he rushed away from her.
She began to fly frantically about the
living room. "Sonny! Sonny, where's
the phone! Where-where's the
phone!?"
"Calm down, calm down, it's right
here." He laughed and picked it up.
Brenda stood across the room from
him, her hair wildly placed about her
head. She smiled excitedly, having
a feeling that this call was about
Alex. She clasped her hands together
in anxiety as Sonny picked the
phone up, pressed talk and said,
"Corinthos."
Brenda watched as he listened intently.
"Jase? Good, what'd you find
out?" Brenda's face, somehow, grew
brighter and wider with a smile of
joy. She watched as Sonny's face,
however, drew into a frown. A deep,
set frown. Something was wrong.
Terribly wrong. "Alright. . . Thanks,
Jason. . . Uh-huh. Yeah, I'll tell
her. . .somehow. Thanks, man. . .
Bye." Brenda's face fell as Sonny
shook his head sadly and dropped the
phone on the couch, beside the
anniversary present she had given him. He
looked down at his feet for a moment,
trying to get the strength up to
tell her.
"Sonny!" Brenda rushed over to him.
"Sonny, tell me! Please." He looked
up and then down into her pleading
face.
His heart broke as he whispered, "I'm so sorry, baby, I'm sorry. She's-"
"No!" Brenda whispered, shaking her head in disbelief. "No, she's not-"
"Yes, Jason. . . He found her bod-"
"Don't say it!" Brenda cried, as
tears fell down her face. "Saying
it-saying it makes it more real
and this is NOT real!" She looked around
frantically. "This is a dream,
Sonny, and I'm going to wake up from it!
I'm going to wake up and Alex is
going to be. . .right down the hall,
and I'm going to hold her and she's
going to KNOW that I love her, she's
not gone! I won't except that!"
Sonny frowned and felt a tear slide
down her cheek. "Sweetheart, baby,
look at me. LOOK AT ME." She brought
her eyes up to his, shaking her
head slightly.
"Sonny. . ." Her voice lowered an
octave and she pleaded, "Please tell
me I'm going to wake up. Please."
He pulled her against him and held
her tightly. "I'm sorry, sweetheart.
I'm so sorry." He squeezed her
tighter as her sobs and shudders began to
get out of control. "Jesus,
I'm so sorry. . ."
Brenda was lying in bed with her
eyes closed one afternoon when she
heard the door slowly creek open
and tiny footsteps on the floor.
Knowing it wasn't Sonny she kept
her eyes closed until she felt the
person brush her hand with her
hair. She opened one eye and saw the top
of Morgan's head at the edge of
her bed.
"Morgan?" She whispered.
Morgan bobbed up and looked at her
mother with wide eyes. "I'm sorry
Mommy. Daddy said I wasn't
apposed to come in here a cause you were
sleeping but I had to find Harley."
She said holding up her teddy bear.
Brenda couldn't help but smile at
her daughter. "Well I'm not sleeping
now so it's okay."
"Really?"
"Yep. Why don't you crawl up here with me?"
"Really?"
"Sure." Brenda pushed back
the covers and Morgan crawled under them
with her and snuggled up next to
her. "What's wrong sweetie?"
"How do you know something's wrong?"
"Because I'm your mommy. I know when something's wrong."
"I was worried about you."
"Why?"
"Cause Daddy said you were sad."
"Well Daddy's right. I am sad. Very sad."
"How come?"
"I lost someone very special to me."
"Did you lose the baby in your tummy?"
"No I didn't but I did lose a child."
"Who?"
"It's a long story baby."
"I have time." Brenda smiled at her daughter.
"Maybe later, okay?"
"Okay Mommy. Mommy?"
"Yeah Baby?"
"I love you."
"I love you, too."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Hey what's for dinner?" Sonny
looked up when he heard Brenda's voice.
She was standing in the door wearing
a pair of his sweatpants and a tank
top. Her hair was wet and
it hung around her shoulders.
"Brenda?"
"Hey honey."
"What are you doing down here?"
"Well to be perfectly honest I decided
it was time to stop being alone.
I missed you and the kids and also
I figured if I stayed in bed much
longer I wouldn't have a house
left." She said as she sat down across
from him.
"Very funny." He reached across
the table and held her hand. "I love
you."
"I love you too." She listened
to the radio for a minute. "Let's
dance."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." Brenda got up and pulled Sonny into her arms.
The strands in your eyes that color
them wonderful
Stop me and steal my breath
Emeralds from mountains thrust
towards the sky
Never revealing their depth
Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings
of love
I'll be captivated, I'll hang from
our lips
Instead of the gallows of heartache
that hang from above
I'll be your cryin shoulder
I'll be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of you
life
Rain falls...angry on the tin roof
As we lie awake in my bed
You're my survival, you're my living
proof
My love is alive and not dead
Tell me that we belong together
Dress it up with the trappings
of love
I'll be captivated, I'll hang from
you lips
Instead of the gallows of heart
ache that hang from above
I'll be your cryin shoulder
Ill be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of you
life
I've dropped out, burned up, fought
my way back from the dead
Tuned in, turned on, remembered
the words that you said
I'll be your cryin shoulder
Ill be love suicide
I'll be better when I'm older
I'll be the greatest fan of you
life
Brenda laid her head on Sonny's
shoulder as they swayed to the music.
Sonny felt her warm breath on his
neck and smiled. He knew it'd be a
while before she was really and
truly alright but this was a good start.
Carly frowned as Brenda sat down
across from her at their table in the
Port Charles Grille. Brenda watched
as Carly's left hand slowly reached
out for hers. Brenda gazed at the
diamond encrusted gold band on Carly's
ring finger and whispered, "How's
Jason?"
Carly sighed. "Jason's fine, Bren.
How are you? Sonny told me you were
taking things pretty hard. . ."
Brenda shrugged and began to twirl
her wedding ring around her finger
unconsciously. "Yeah, I am, Carly.
I am. But I have Sonny, he's
wonderful. He's understanding
and loving and patient. It's like he's a
totally different person."
"Sonny's not the only person you
have." Brenda looked up at Carly across
the table. "You have me. And Jason,
and Lois and Alexis and Ned and your
children, *all* of the Qs, you
know that Luke and Laura ADORE you, and
even you and Lizzie have become
friends."
Brenda bit her lip, nodding. "Then
why do I still feel so empty, Carly?
Why do I feel as if my heart has
been ripped from it's place in my chest
and been thrown into a vat of boiling
acid? Even being married to the
most handsome, loving, sexy man
in this entire world. . .can't stop me
from feeling as if my world has
ended."
"Baby, that's normal." When Brenda
shook her head in disbelief, still
gazing down at her napkin, Carly
prodded, "It *is*, Brenda! All you can
do is let the people who love you
be there for you. You can't push them
away. You *can't*!" Brenda ran
a hand through her hair and fought back
the urge to cry. As she brought
her head up, a figure in the doorway of
the restaurant. Carly watched as
her face drained of color, and then
became bright red with fury. She
gasped as Brenda stormed to her feet,
knocking her chair and water glass
down. "Bren-Brenda!" Carly spun
around and saw Jax standing in
the doorway, waiting to be seated. Brenda
rushed over to him, as fast as
her three inch heeled shoes would allow.
Carly was right behind her, but
didn't make it in time to pull Brenda
off of him as she screamed,
"Murderer!" Brenda launched herself
at Jax, shrieking and slapping and
punching him. Jax feebly tried
to fight off her flailing fists, as
waiters and customers turned to
look at what the commotion was.
"Brenda! Dammit, Brenda!" Carly
yanked her friend off of Jax, trying to
hush her.
"You killed my little girl!" Brenda
cried, angrily wiping at the tears
that fell down her face.
"Brenda, stop it!" Carly hissed, her grip on Brenda's arms tightening.
"She was my daughter too, Brenda!"
Jax snapped angrily. "I would NEVER,
EVER harm her, for any reason,
for anything in the world!"
Brenda shook her head furiously
as more tears fell. "I hate you, Jax! I
hate you! I never thought I would
look at you and hate you, but I do!
And you can tell the rest of your
damn family that I *HATE* them too!!!"
Carly began to gently pull Brenda
back, but she shook her head,
snapping, "No!" and yanked herself
away. Carly watched helplessly as
Brenda grabbed her bag and stormed
out of the restaurant.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Sonny was looking over some files
in Luke's when the telephone rang. He
sighed and reached over for it.
"Luke's, Corinthos speaking."
"Sonny?"
"Carly?"
"Yeah, hi, listen-"
"Hey. What's up?"
"Is Brenda there?" Carly sounded frantic.
"No, she said she was having lunch with you, why?"
"Because she. . .she had a run in with Jax-"
"Dammit," Sonny hissed under his
breath, running a hand through his
disheveled hair.
"Yeah. She's really upset, I think
she needs. . .I think she needs you
right now, okay? So, if she-"
Just then, Sonny's attention was
adverted when a sobbing Brenda came
rushing into the office. She was
wearing a beautiful lavender sweater
suit, a short lavender skirt and
a matching jacket. Her beautiful face,
which she had spent 45 minutes
applying make-up to that morning, was red
and streaked with black tears,
made that way from her supposedly
waterproof mascara.
"Carly?"
"Yeah?"
"She's here, I'll call you back." Sonny hung up the phone and stood up.
"Baby?"
"Hold me!" Brenda choked out. "Please."
Sonny sighed as he slid his arms
around her. She buried her face in his
chest. "Ah, baby." He stroked her
hair. "It's going to get better, I
promise. The pain'll go away."
Brenda hiccuped a sob and looked
up into his face. "It hurts so much,
Sonny, I don't know how to get
through it. It hurts even more than when
I lost you, Sonny, I feel like...I'll
never get through this without
you. I need you so much-"
Sonny lowered his head, taking her
face in his hands. He stroked her
hair away from her face with his
thumbs, and then kissed her softly.
"Come on, baby, let's go home."
Sliding an arm around her, Sonny led
Brenda out of the office.
Next
Part
Second
Chance Menu
Main
Menu