Innocence Lost - 10

The wind that was rushing around Carly kept her face dry of any tears
and her mind free of any thoughts about her mother.  The roar of the
motorcycle was so loud in the quiet night that she couldn't hear herself
think.  She was disappointed when they slowed near a gas station, on the
side of the highway.  Carly didn't even know where they were, or where
they were going.  She had told Jason to drive his bike to the ends of
the earth for all she cared at this point.

The only company the gas station had for miles was a small shabby diner,
announcing in bright neon letters, "open 24 hours, home cooked meals."
Carly made a face when she saw it, doubting the meals tasted even close
to home cooked.

Jason pulled the bike over to a gas pump and killed the engine.  Carly
jumped off of it, not having realized that her legs were stiff from
sitting cramped on the seat for so long.  She groaned at the pain of the
blood flow that suddenly crept into her legs.  Jason glanced at her,
looking concerned.  Carly rolled her eyes.

"Don't..." she warned, not wanting him to feel the least bit sorry for
her.  She didn't have the strength to talk about what had happened.  She
wanted to pretend that it didn't.

Jason shook his head, looking away.  He knew how she felt, and he was
going to do his best to make this as easy on her as possible.  He dug
into his pocket and pulled out a twenty dollar bill.

"Could you go pay for this when I'm done pumping the gas?" he asked,
handing her the money.  "And get me a water, and whatever else you
want."

Carly nodded, grateful for something to do.  She sauntered over to the
mini mart, regarding the shady looking character behind the counter.  He
raised his eyebrows as she entered, watching her as she went to the
cooler and pulled out two bottles of water.  His eyes followed her all
the way back to the counter where she put the water down and threw the
twenty down next to them.

"That, and whatever the total's gonna be on #2," she said dryly.  She
was tired and dispirited, and definitely not in the mood to be hit on my
a convenience store worker in the middle of BFE.

The cashier didn't pick up on her disinterest.  "What's a pretty young
thing like you doing out here this late at night?"

Carly raised one eyebrow at him, and smirked.  "I'm buying two waters
and some gas," she remarked, glancing out the doors at Jason who was
still filling the tank.  She silently cursed him to hurry up with that
gas.

"I can see that," the cashier said, following her gaze out the doors.
"Is that your boyfriend?"

"I'll tell you what he is," Carly said, leaning on the counter.  She
picked up a peppermint from a display marked 'ten cents each', and
popped it in her mouth.  "He is none of your business."

The cashier grinned at this, unswayed.  "I'll take that protective
answer as a yes," he grunted, punching up the total on the register.
"Two waters,  $9.37 on pump #2, and," he pointed at the peppermint
display.  "One peppermint."

Carly rolled her eyes, pushing the twenty dollar bill toward him on the
counter.  She was about to make a smart remark when she heard the grainy
sounds of Soul Asylum’s Runaway Train on the radio.  She paused,
listening for a moment, mesmerized by the words.

~Runaway train never going back
Wrong way on a one way track
How on earth did I get so jaded
Life's mysteries seem so faded
I can go where no one else can go
I know what no one else knows
I've got a ticket on a one way train
I run away but it always seems the same...~

They seemed to be describing her exactly.  She swallowed hard, willing
the sudden lump that had formed in her throat to disappear.  She was not
going to cry.  Not in front of this stranger, not in front of Jason, and
not while she was alone.  She wasn’t going to cry at all and that was
that.  Carly dipped her head, blinking fast to keep the tears at bay.
She tuned the song out of her mind, and concentrated on the change that
was being placed into her hand.

She pocketed the change and gathered the waters into her arms.  She used
this time to gain her wits about her, shaking her head as if to shake
any uncomfortable thoughts away.  Sauntering toward the double glass
doors that would lead her to the outside, she leaned back, picking up
another peppermint and unwrapping it, smiling coyly at the cashier as
she popped it in her mouth.

*~*

After another hour and a half on the motorcycle, Jason was exhausted and
knew that if he didn’t stop soon, he’d fall right asleep.  He’d
suspected that Carly had fallen asleep, or at least dozed, against his
back, for she was quiet and still most of the ride since the gas
station.

They passed a sign that said Huntersville, population 835.  Jason
steered his bike into the dirt parking lot of a shabby looking motel
with a glaring vacancy sign outside.

As he parked and shut off the engine, Carly finally stirred.
“Huntersville Inn?” she muttered, swinging her leg off the bike and
stretching them out.  “This place is a real dump.”

Jason looked at her amusedly, while he pulled at the bungee cords in
order to free the duffel bag.  “I didn’t know you were such high
society,”  he muttered, pulling the bag off the bike and throwing it
over his shoulder.  “As long as the room’s got four walls, a roof and a
bed, I’m happy.”

Carly snickered at this, thinking of the boxcar.  “I guess four walls, a
roof and a bed is a step up for you,” she joked, following him into the
motel.

*~*

The room was almost exactly that, four walls, a roof and a bed.  There
was a table which held a phone and phone book, but it looked as though
it would crumble under it’s own weight at any second.  There was a small
bathroom off to the side, housing a tiny sink, toilet, and shower that
looked like it hadn’t been cleaned since the place was built.  And
considering the innkeeper had boasted that theirs was one of the first
motel’s in town, it was a pretty grungy bathroom.

Jason lay on the bed, his eyes closed, resting on clasped hands anchored
behind his head.  Carly found him this way, almost asleep, when she’d
finished freshening up in the bathroom.  She bounced on the bed, intent
on waking him up.

Slowly, reluctantly, Jason opened his eyes, having a hard time focusing
at first.  “What?” he muttered, clearly annoyed.  He could finally make
her features out, and realized she’d taken down her ponytail, leaving
her hair swinging loosely around her shoulders.  It was tousled just
enough to look sexy but not messy.  She’d changed from her white v-neck
shirt to a tight red one, and it brought out the fire in her eyes.

He groaned, sitting up.  His back and legs were stiff from riding the
bike for so long.  “You look nice,” he said, letting his eyes trail
appreciatively over her body.

Carly beamed, determined to keep a positive spin on her mood.  She had
vowed to herself not to become the martyr in this situation.  It was bad
enough Jason had been there when she’d had to confront her mother.
Never mind that Jason was the *reason* she’d had to confront her mother.
She’d decided to let that one slide for now.  He’d helped her out so
much before…she still felt guilty about the blow up they’d had in the
box car earlier that evening.  This was something Carly was determined
to get through herself, and perhaps being away from Port Charles would
help her put it all into perspective.

Carly knew deep down that there was another reason she wanted to come
off as happy-go-lucky around Jason.  She knew he’d probably eventually
leave her and head back to Port Charles.  Carly wanted that to be as far
in the future as possible.  She thought maybe if she just made herself
as irresistible as possible, he wouldn’t want to leave.  She knew this
was the type of ridiculous high-school game that he would resent, but
Carly couldn't help herself.  She did anything she had to to get what
she wanted.  That was her nature.

“Come on,” she said, pulling him all the way off the bed and into a
standing position.

Jason groaned, not hiding the fact that he did not want to get up.
Carly was already near the door.  Jason shook his head.  “Did we decide
to go somewhere while I was asleep?” he asked

Carly laughed, swinging the door open and pointing across the street to
a run-down shack that was probably serving as the town bar.  A faint
string of honkey tonk music could be heard when the wind blew right.
“Just buy me one beer,” she asked, pouting at him then smiling, trying
to look as appealing as possible.

Carly didn’t realize it, but she looked so appealing that Jason wanted
to stay in and concentrate solely on her.  He went to her, linking his
arms around her waist and burying his face into her hair.  “Let’s just
stay in,” he murmured, swaying his body lightly and enjoying the feel of
it brushing up against hers.

Carly shook her head.  “Think of the ruckus we could raise in there,”
she insisted, guiding him out the door.  “What did that sign say,
population 835?  Come on!  You can’t pass this up.  We’ll send these
small town folks spinning.  They won’t know what hit them!”

Carly was excited, contiguously so.  Jason realized that she *had* been
awake on the ride into town, she’d caught the population sign at least.
He couldn’t resist her enthusiasm.  He never could and knew that he
would go to the ends of the earth for her.

“Okay,” he muttered, shutting the door behind them and putting an arm
around her as they crossed the dark road and approached the bar.

Carly pulled the heavy doors open and peered inside.  She shook Jason’s
arm off her shoulder as she stepped inside, surveying her surroundings.
There weren’t many patrons that night, although Carly supposed there
probably never was.  She took a seat on a barstool, directly in front of
the bartender.  Jason hung back, standing behind her in a protective
manner rather than sitting next to her.

Heads had turned when they’d entered, and Jason recognized the desirous
looks on the faces of most of the older men in the place.  He knew Carly
would take full advantage of their interest, and was slightly annoyed at
the role of the bouncer that he would surely have to play by the end of
the night.

Carly ordered two beers and two shots of tequila.  “You ever do a body
shot?” she asked, glancing back at Jason.

Jason looked at her in annoyance.  She knew exactly what he had and
hadn’t done in his whole short life.

Carly giggled, rolling her eyes at the bartender.  “Oh, right,” she
said.  Then added, “you’ll love it.”

The bartender regarded Jason who looked pretty menacing considering the
other patrons in the bar.  Most of the men were over fifty, overweight,
and overbearing.   He leaned into Carly as he poured their shots.
“What’s with your pretty boyfriend?”

Carly laughed at this, throwing her head back.  She recovered quickly,
taking a small sip of her beer and leaning in also, to whisper to the
bartender.  “He’s my bodyguard,” she said, then, when the bartender
looked confused, she added, “he guards my body.”  She seductively rubbed
her hand down her side.

“It’s a body that certainly deserves guarding,” the bartender murmured,
eyeing her appreciatively.  He placed two lime wedges against the shot
glasses and a salt shaker in front of Carly.

Carly smiled appreciatively.  “Thanks,” she said, motioning Jason over.
“For the compliment...and the accessories to our shots.”

The bartender nodded, and leaned on the bar back, watching his two
newest customers.  They were definitely not from around there, that was
obvious.  City kids, he gathered.  They definitely had a story.  He
watched in amusement as the blonde explained to her friend how a body
shot worked.

Carly was right about this one, Jason definitely liked the sounds of
this shot.  “I get to choose where I put the salt?” he asked, just to be
sure, his eyes twinkling.

Carly jumped up from the barstool and did a small pirouette.  “Anywhere
your little heart desires, sweetheart,” she said, her voice husky.

Jason looked her over, his tongue escaping his lips involuntarily as he
drank in her gorgeous figure.  He trailed his hands along her collar
bone, debating this for a moment, then let his hands fall lower, tracing
the curve of her waist.  He trailed his finger along the hem line of her
shirt, where it barely met her low rise denim jeans.

“Right here,” he said, stopping his finger near her belly button.

Carly looked up at him, her eyes dancing.  She looked over to the
bartender.  “And he said he’s never played this game before.”

She lifted her shirt a little and arched her back, exposing her milky
skin.  Jason glanced at the bartender, who was watching in fascination,
and decided to ignore him.  He leaned down, licked her skin just enough
to make it moist, and poured a generous amount of salt on it from the
shaker.

Carly giggled at this, handing him the tequila shot and the lime.
“Okay, now, lick the salt, take the shot, and eat the lime.  And after
this one, I’ve got another one we can try.”

Jason smiled, so overwhelmed by this public act of sexual lewdness, he
couldn’t even wrap his mind around another one right now.  Carly tipped
her beer back, taking a large swallow as she arched her back again,
giggling as the loose grains of salt rolled down her stomach and
disappeared into her jeans.

Jason leaned in, licking the salt off of her, and in one quick motion,
downed the shot.  He grinned at Carly as he nibbled on the lime.  Carly
stood tall again, slightly dazed.  She shook her head slightly, then
leaned on the bar, taking another large swig of her beer.  Jason did the
same, eyeing her carefully.

“Your turn,” he said, still smiling.

Without hesitation, Carly licked her own lips, then leaned up, pulled
away the neckline of his t-shirt, and kissed him in her favorite spot,
where his neck met his collar bone, smoothing out into strong broad
shoulders.

“Hold this,” she commanded, allowing him to take his pulled away t-shirt
from her.  “Hold that open,” she said, as she reached for the salt
shaker.

Carly mimicked Jason’s maneuvers carefully, lingering on his neck a
little longer, sucking each grain of salt off, for effect.  She laughed
after she’d taken the shot.  “I don’t need that,” she bragged, pointing
to the other lime wedge that still sat on the counter.  She grabbed her
beer instead, using it as a chaser.  She finished it off, and eyed
Jason's, which hadn’t been touched.

“You going to drink that?” she asked, reaching for it before he could
answer.

Jason stepped back, holding his hands up.  “Go ahead,” he smirked,
resuming his post behind her.  Carly climbed back on the barstool, and
regarded him with narrowed eyes.

“Come back over here,” she said.  “I need you as my prop for this next
shot.”

Jason rolled his eyes, but obliged.  She handed him the unused lime
wedge.

“Put this in your mouth, hold it half way, between your teeth,” Carly
instructed, gritting her teeth to show him.  Jason did, holding the tip
of the wedge between his teeth, the rest sticking out of his mouth.  He
felt ridiculous.

The bartender poured another shot and handed it to Carly.  Carly picked
it up, and without hesitation, threw it back, feeling the hot liquid
burn down her throat.  With a little difficulty, she swallowed it, then
leaned up to Jason, putting her mouth around the rest of the lime wedge,
touching her lips to his.  She let them linger there for a moment,
throwing her hands  around his neck and pressing herself closer to him.
Slowly, reluctantly, she pulled away, taking the pulp off the lime peel
as she did so.

Carly finally stood back, smiling triumphantly at the dazed look on
Jason’s face.  She grabbed the beer that was his, and downed the rest of
it, signaling the bartender for one more.

“Carly,” Jason warned, finally coming to grips with himself.  “Maybe you
should slow down.”

Carly glared at him.  She said nothing, and he knew to leave her alone.
Obviously she was numbing herself after what had happened with Bobbie
earlier in the night.  Jason knew he had to let her do what she was
going to do.  He certainly would expect the same courtesy from her.  He
stepped back again, and this time, she didn’t stop him.

Carly turned her attention to the bartender who was placing her third
beer in front of her.  “You got a ride home?” he asked, holding his hand
out, intent on taking her keys.

Carly pointed vaguely behind her.  “I told you he guards my body,” she
said slowly, her words beginning to slightly slur.  She realized she
hadn’t eaten dinner and she’d better lay off the tequila if she didn’t
want to be sick later.  “That means, when he’s around, nothing happens
to it.”

The bartender smiled, regarding the man who had taken a seat to Carly’s
left.  The man held out his hand, indicating he didn’t want another
drink.  He was still nursing what looked to be scotch.  Carly ignored
him, taking a sip of her new beer, this time a smaller one.

“That looked like a little more than body guarding to me, sugar,” the
bartender drawled, turning his attention back to Carly.  He glanced at
Jason from the corner of his eye, who hadn’t moved but was obviously
aware of the attention Carly was getting from the new gentleman beside
her.

Carly leaned in, her eyes flashing, not realizing the man beside her was
following her every move.  “Listen, *sugar*,” she drawled, matching his
lacksidasical tone.  “I don’t think you want to question his existence
too much,” she warned, trying to look foreboding.  “He doesn’t like
that.”

The bartender grinned slightly, but stepped back to lean against the bar
back once again.  “Whatever, sugar,” he droned.  “Maybe you should tell
that to your new friends.”  He pointed toward the man to Carly’s left,
then to a new gentleman who’d taken a seat to her right.

Carly regarded them, a little nervous at first, but a quick swig of the
beer in front of her loosened her nerves.  She was even beginning to
find this fun.  She thought about Jason who must be about having a hissy
fit behind her, but she shrugged it off, deciding that he could leave
when and if he wanted to.  Deep down Carly knew he wouldn’t, and she
intended on taking full advantage of that situation.

“Well, hello fellas!” she said in a sing song voice, looking from her
left to her right.  She regarded her beer, then took another swig.  She
was more than three fourths of the way done on this one.  “Which one of
you is going to refresh my drink pretty soon?”

The man to her right grunted.  He dug in his pocked and pulled out a
ten, throwing it on the counter.  “Whatever the little lady wants,” he
said, winking at her.

Carly put a hand over her mouth to stifle a laugh.  “Oooh,” she crooned.
“Big spender.”

The man frowned a little, but it faded when Carly flashed him a megawatt
smile.  “You want to try one of those body shots with me?” he asked,
obviously feeling a bout of confidence.

Carly glanced at his pudgy body, covered with hair, and tried not to gag
at the thought.  “No more shots for me,” she warned.  “Or else you’ll be
carrying me home.”

“I’d love to carry you home,” the other gentleman muttered, more to
himself than anyone else.  Carly heard though, and immediately turned
toward him.

“I like a man who says what’s on his mind,” she announced.  “What’s your
name?”

“I’m Ben,” the man said, taking her hand and shaking it, grinning as he
did so.  “What can I call you?”

Carly thought for a minute.  She decided to have some fun.  “I’m
Bonnie,” she said with a straight face.  She pointed over at Jason.
“That there’s Clyde.”

Both men and the bartender erupted in laughter.  Jason scowled at them.
Carly blew him a quick kiss before turning her attention back to the men
at the bar.  “And you are…?” she said, looking expectantly at the guy
who’d just bought her another beer.  “Besides my sponsor tonight I
mean,” she said, unable to help herself.

The man grinned, an ugly, dirty grin, and pushed her beer towards her.
“I’m Jerry.”

Carly snorted at this.  “Ben and Jerry?  Are you two trying to pull a
fast one on me?”

The men glanced at each other, each one shaking with silent laughter.
They weren’t partners, but it suited the occasion perfectly, considering
they were talking to Bonnie and Clyde.

“No,” Jerry insisted.  “I don’t even know the guy.  But you ain’t
Bonnie, and that’s not Clyde,” he remarked.

Carly shimmied a bit in her seat.  “Maybe not,” she tossed at them.
“But who cares, I mean, *really*.”  She eyed one, then the other, a
smoldering look in her eyes.  “You guys dance?”

Ben grunted a little, obviously uncomfortable at this question.  Jerry
was silent.

“Okay,” Carly said, trying another angle.  “Could you at least pick the
music?”  She tilted her head back, downing half her beer at once.  She
was definitely buzzed now, nearing drunkenness.  It was numbing her
senses, making her forget everything that had happened earlier in the
night.

Jerry got up and sauntered over to the jukebox.  He glanced at Jason as
he passed him, and muttered, “Hey Clyde,” under his breath.  Jason
wanted to reel back and knock that smirk right off his face.  Instead,
he glared at Carly.

As the slow country music filled the room, a few couples headed toward
the dance floor.  Jerry resumed his post at the barstool to Carly's
left, and watched appreciatively as Carly climbed off her barstool and
began to sway back and forth to the beat.   She lifted her hands over
her head, moving her waist seductively to the music.  Carly caught
Jason’s gaze and glided over to him, licking her lips as she took in his
chiseled features.

Without a word, she circled her arms around his waist, rubbing her body
against his.  “Dance with me,” she murmured, feeling completely lost in
the moment.

Jason shook his head, holding his ground.  Carly pouted, then remembered
her friends at the bar.  “Don’t you want to see him dance with me?” she
asked sweetly, throwing them her most irresistible expression.

Both men shook their heads.  “Not really, gorgeous,” Ben piped up,
rubbing his hands over his mouth.  “Although I wouldn’t mind seeing
*you* move that way all night.”

Carly grimaced at these words and braced herself against Jason.  “Maybe
I will,” she tossed back, adding silently, “but not with you.”  She
tightened her grip on Jason’s waist, forcing him to move with her as she
swayed to the rhythm.  She moved her hands up his back, inside his
jacket, and pulled herself up to his face.

“Don’t be mad,” she pleaded, sensing his anger or uncomfort, she wasn’t
quite sure which.  “I’m just having a little fun.”

Jason nodded, relaxing a bit and leaning into her, breathing in the
now-smoky smell of her hair.

Carly smiled, placing soft kisses along his neck.  She felt Jason’s lips
meet her ear, and she leaned her head back, letting him trace a similar
trail down her neck and collar bone.

“Bodyguard my ass,” she heard the bartender growl, letting out a low
wolf whistle as he watched them.

Hearing this, Jason looked up and glared at him, then put his face back
down to Carly’s ear.  “Let’s get out of here,” he murmured, putting a
small amount of pressure on the small of her back with his hand.

Carly groaned softly at this, and nodded her approval.    “Bye boys,”
she sang as Jason threw a fifty on the counter and they made their way
to the door.

*~*

Once back inside their room, Jason didn’t hesitate in pulling Carly to
him.  He let his mouth fall onto hers in a hungry, if not desperate
kiss.  It seemed like ages since he’d last kissed her like this.

Carly melted into him, feeling drunk and out of control, but completely
safe in this mans arms.  “Just don’t lay me down,” she murmured against
his lips.  “I don’t want to spin.”

Jason pulled his mouth away from hers, and, holding her at the waist,
looked into her eyes, a bit of amusement crossing his face.  “Okay,” he
said, smiling.  “This should be fun.”

Carly giggled a bit, then hiccuped.  Jason closed his mouth over hers
again, running his tongue over her bottom lip before slipping it into
her mouth and tasting her fully.  His hands made their way down to her
rib cage, and he let them slip inside her shirt, tracing soft circles
over her back.

Carly shivered at his touch on her bare skin.  Her head swam, a victim
of both the alcohol and the desire that overcame her whenever Jason was
near.  It was completely intoxicating, and Carly couldn't find herself
anywhere in the moment.  She was completely lost, completely
surrendering herself to Jason and whatever he wanted.  It was okay this
way.  This way, he was in control and she didn't have to make any
decisions.  This way, she couldn't screw anything up.  She trusted him
unconditionally, with her whole being.  She loved him.  This thought
made her breath catch in her throat.  It shocked her, and sent her
reeling.

Jason took her sudden gasp as a sign of pleasure, and laid her on the
bed ignoring her wish for him not to do so.  Carly didn't spin like
she'd expected.  She was too caught up in Jason and what he was doing to
her to notice or care.  She reveled in his attention and drifted off
into the world that was theirs and theirs alone.

*~*

Jason awoke the next morning to the sounds of Carly throwing up in the
bathroom.  He shoved the covers off of himself, put on a pair of boxers,
and shuffled, sleepy eyed, to the bathroom door.

"Carly?" he muttered, pushing the door open just slightly.

Carly groaned at the sound of his voice, slamming the door shut.  "Leave
me alone," she said, as loud and strong as she could.  She hadn't eaten
the night before and was just plain stupid about how much she drank.
She wouldn't have normally been except that it was the only way she
could think of to forget about Bobbie Spencer and what had happened
earlier in the night.

Jason obliged, running a hand through his short, messy hair and sitting
at the edge of the bed to wait.  He looked around, wondering where
exactly they were, then closed his eyes, letting himself fall back onto
the bed.

Carly emerged from the bathroom a short time later, brushing her teeth.
"Sorry," she muttered, her mouth full of toothpaste.  She grinned
sheepishly, and sat next to Jason on the bed.

Jason got up and went into the bathroom, splashing water on his face.
"Where do you think we are, Carly?" he asked, trying to keep the
conversation off her mother and alcohol, for the time being at least.

Carly continued running her toothbrush over her teeth while she thought.
"We were going north east right?  We're probably in Connecticut or
Vermont or something."  With this, she got up and joined Jason at the
sink, leaning over him to spit the toothpaste out.

"Where do you want to go?" Jason asked, putting the toilet seat down and
sitting on top of it.  He smiled at the face Carly made as she flossed.

She shrugged, uncomfortable with the conversation all of a sudden.  She
knew, after last night, that she didn't want to lose him.  If that meant
going back to Port Charles, she was willing.  Carly couldn't believe
she'd just thought that, but it was true.  Jason was the best thing that
had come into her life in a very long time and she couldn't give it up
because of some woman who'd given her up twenty-two years ago.

"Jason," she said, firmly, putting the floss down and turning to face
him.  "I think we should go back."

Jason looked at her, surprised.  She was constantly changing her mind,
that was true, but he was sure that she'd had her mind made up on this
one.  And the truth was, he would go wherever she wanted to go, and
probably not leave unless she'd asked him to.  More and more, every day
that he saw her, he realized his feelings for her.  The night he'd
rescued her at Luke's from some guy who was harassing her.  Then in the
boxcar when he'd told her he had everything because he had her.  He'd
held her all night that night, sex had nothing to do with it.  Then,
even after they'd gotten in that huge fight the night before, when she'd
thrown stuff at him and screamed nasty things, he still didn't want her
to leave.  He still felt that he would do anything for her.  Jason
wanted to help her.  He was willing to leave Port Charles just to be
with her, not that it was much of a stretch, since Port Charles was
nothing to him except the place he'd woken up.  But still, last night,
and everything that had happened in the span of a few short hours, Jason
realized that there wasn't one thing he *wouldn't* do for this girl.  It
had scared him at first, but now he was so sure of it, it just felt
right.  Jason was in love with her.

"Are you sure you want to?" Jason asked, staring at Carly, trying to
read her mind.  As usual, he couldn't.

Carly nodded slowly, wondering if she should come clean with why she was
willing to go back.  She decided against it, and wished she had someone
to talk to besides him.  He was fine to talk to most of the time, except
when the topic *was* him.  Carly sighed, wishing for a friend, a
confidant...her mother.

She nearly choked on the thought.  But the more she thought about it,
the more it didn't make her want to throw up all over again.  Okay,
maybe Bobbie would never be her mother...as Carly had said the night
before, that ship had sailed long ago.  Carly didn't need a mother
anymore.  But she did need a friend.  She always had and never seemed to
be able to keep one after the real Carly died.  She wandered from the
bathroom, not even aware that she'd left Jason sitting, waiting for an
answer.  As if in a trance, she found her jeans from the night before,
and pulled Bobbie's card out of the pocket.  She turned it over and over
in her hands, as she had last night.  Carly half expected the words on
it to disappear.

Barbara Jean Spencer.  The words were in bold face helvetica type.
Carly's eyes blurred with tears as she read her mother's name over and
over.  The more she thought about having Bobbie Spencer as a *friend*
the more ludicrous the idea sounded.  And the more ludicrous it sounded,
the more she wanted it.  Such was Carly Roberts.  Carly chuckled a bit
at this thought.

Finally, after an eternity, Carly picked up the phone and dialed.


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